Waiting for Belief

I stand alone
Waiting for belief
Wondering if love
Will find me again
The secrets I kept
Made me sick
I shared them
And got shit
For my trouble
Belief does not come
Love does not come
I die a little
Each day
They don’t believe me
Those who believe
Don’t know
What to say
Those whose words
I need to hear
Will never speak
Never apologize
I live in fear
Sleep in fear
I walk through life
Afraid of shadows
Afraid of anger
The voice in my head
Telling me I lied
Makes me feel
Like I am wrong
But it happened
I know
And no one believes
I stand alone
Waiting for belief
It will never come
Fear will never leave
This is my life
I want out of it
To die and
Let my family
Sort it out
Friends get tired
Of hearing
Friends get tired
Of isolation
Depression and fear
They don’t understand
It isn’t their place
To hold me up
To be my safety
I stand alone
Waiting for belief
That will never come
Waiting for fear
To lose its grip
And let me live
A life of peace
When does it end?
The past in my head
Tearing my mind
Twisting my soul